reshiham:

yifflord:

reshiham:

why cant your nose be 12 inches long?

because then it’ll be a foot

bustysaintclair:

meowdypurrtner:

its really important for men to stand up to other men who say terrible and sexist shit

because sexist men dont listen to what women have to say

literally the most important thing men can do if they want to call themselves feminist allies 

tacobelligerent:

tacobelligerent:

I STEPPED ON A FUCKING LEAF AND AT THE SAME TIME SOME KID SCREAMED I THOUGHT IT WAS THE FUCKIN LEAF OMG

why do we always have to reblog my mistakes

baeddeldeer:

Why do ppl get so mad when girls like themselves

mothwizard:

me: i want something very short and small and cutesy but most importantly body safe and discreet

sex toy companies: try the DEVASTATOR SEVENTY THREE INCHES OF PURE JELLY RUBBER HYPER REALISTIC VEINS WE SHOWED IT TO A NUN ONCE AND SHE BURST INTO FLAMES THERE’S ONLY ONE SETTING: DEVASTATION THE VIBRATIONS CAUSED AN EARTHQUAKE MILLIONS ARE DEAD

nialllhoran:

WHY ARE PHONES GETTING BIGGER WHEN GIRLS STILL BARELY HAVE POCKETS IN THEIR PANTS

quickbewitty:

quickbewitty:

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?

Because they lactose

i remember when we broke up

the first time
saying, “this is it, i’ve had enough,”

‘cause like
we hadn’t seen each other in a month
when you

said you

needed

space

                                     what

thebaconsandwichofregret:

kimbbearly:

why dont humans have a specific noise that means “there are bees here lets leave immediately” why are elephants more advanced than us

we do have a specific noise, it sounds like this:

“there are bees here lets leave immediately”

meadowkitten:

ok apparently if a duckling imprints on a human and doesn’t meet other ducklings he ends up believing he’s a human too. that’s unbelievable. what if im just a duckling with an overactive imagination. what if im just a sleeping duckling and this is all a dream